I’ve had some weirdo dreams lately. I’ve been on summer vacation for exactly a week now, so maybe it’s my brain finally starting to relax and let loose. Not too loose, however. In one part of my dream last night, someone started to break out into song – a song I didn’t recognize. I thought, “Great. One of the three songs in the Western cannon of popular music that I don’t know. Stop it. Stop it now!”

I guess I won’t allow song and dance numbers even in my dreams.

Speaking of songs and dances, Liza-with-a-Z made a cameo appearance as well. I asked Ms. Minnelli for career advice. I don’t remember what she said, but it may have included staying the hell away from David Gest.

The other night, I did synchronized swimming with Keenan Ivory Wayans, found out Jane Lynch did not want to be my best friend, and discussed repairing microwave ovens with Howard Wolowitz from “The Big Bang Theory.”

I may want to revisit my pre-bedtime diet, because, damn.